My Colleague Asked Me Out on a Date—I Should Have Said No

For a long time, I held a secret admiration for Daniel, a colleague who led our department. His presence was always noticeable, and I found myself drawn to his confident manner. When he unexpectedly invited me to dinner, I felt a surge of excitement, a feeling I hadn’t experienced in years.

I had observed Daniel for a considerable period, noticing how he seemed to effortlessly command attention. His confident way of walking, his friendly smile, and the way people naturally gathered around him at office events were all things I admired. My friend, Margo, would often gently remind me that we were in different social circles, a fact I was well aware of. Daniel’s dates at company gatherings were always individuals who looked like they belonged on magazine covers.

I, on the other hand, had a different build. I consistently engaged in physical activity and participated in sports, but my body developed strength rather than a slender appearance. I had also experimented with various popular eating plans, but the desired changes in my physique didn’t occur. At 32, I was attempting to accept my body as it was, but it was a challenge. It can be difficult when you feel like you’re constantly being judged based on your appearance.

One Tuesday afternoon, however, something unexpected happened. I was focused on completing some reports, and the office was nearly empty. It was late, and I was startled when Daniel approached my workspace.

“Still working late?” he asked, leaning against my cubicle.

I nodded, feeling a little flustered as his pleasant scent filled my small area.

“Cindy, I’ve noticed your dedication,” he said, smiling. “Would you like to have dinner tomorrow after work? You’ve earned a break.”

My heart skipped a beat. “Dinner? With you?”

“Unless you have other plans?” he asked with a playful expression.

“No, I mean, yes. Dinner sounds wonderful.” I managed to say, surprised by my own eagerness.

“Great. Luigi’s at seven? It’s the Italian restaurant on Maple Street. I’ll meet you there.”

I nodded, watching him walk away. It wasn’t until he was out of sight that I allowed myself to fully process what had just happened.

I immediately called Margo. “You won’t believe what just happened.”

“What is it? Did you finally resolve that issue with the numbers?” Margo asked, with her children making noises in the background.

“Daniel asked me out. To dinner. Tomorrow.”

There was a brief silence.

Then, Margo exclaimed, “Are you serious? Daniel from the department?”

“Yes,” I confirmed, still feeling a bit overwhelmed.

“This is amazing! I’m coming over with my blue dress. The one that looks good on anyone.”

“You don’t have to! I’m still at work. Can we meet at my place later?”

The next day seemed to pass very slowly. Daniel acted as usual during the morning meeting, but his subtle smile when our eyes met made me feel certain that the dinner invitation was real.

I arrived at the restaurant a bit early, wearing Margo’s blue dress. The host led me to a table in the corner, and I ordered some water while I waited.

I waited for quite some time.

“Would you like more water?” the waiter asked, with a look of concern.

“He’s just running late,” I said, trying to sound confident.

By 7:30, I had nervously folded and refolded my napkin. Then, the waiter returned with a folded note.

“This was left for you at the front desk,” he said.

My hands trembled as I opened it, hoping for an explanation.

Instead, I read: “Please go to the restroom. And when you enter, please lock the door behind you ;)”

My stomach sank.

This was not the Daniel I had imagined. This was inappropriate and suggested something I would never agree to.

Was this his impression of me? Did he think I was so desperate that I would agree to such a thing on a first meeting?

I felt a wave of anger and disappointment. I decided to confront him and leave with my dignity intact.

I opened the restroom door and was shocked by what I saw.

Daniel was inside with two colleagues from the marketing department. One of them was holding a phone, pointing the camera directly at me. All three of them were laughing.

“That’s it, the bet’s over. I did it,” Daniel said, looking at his friends.

“A bet?” I asked, my voice barely audible.

Daniel shrugged. “Nothing personal.”

His friends followed him, still recording and laughing. I stood there, feeling humiliated.

Even worse than the thought of him wanting a quick meeting in the restroom was the realization that I was the target of a childish prank.

I went home and felt very upset.

The next morning, I learned that Daniel had taken things further.

My phone was constantly buzzing with messages from a work chat group. When I opened it, I saw that Daniel had shared the video of me entering the restroom, with a caption that made it seem like I had agreed to his inappropriate suggestion.

It was bad enough that I was part of a foolish bet, but now he was making me look foolish in front of everyone.

I couldn’t face my coworkers, so I stayed home. I was shocked by Daniel’s behavior. Had I been so influenced by his appearance that I didn’t see his true character?

I stayed home again the next day. On the third day, my phone rang, and I saw that it was Mr. Reynolds, the owner of the company.

I felt a sense of dread.

“Hello?” I answered.

“Cindy,” Mr. Reynolds said. “I need you in the office within the hour. Or you’ll be clearing your desk.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Report to my secretary when you arrive.”

Ninety minutes later, I walked into the conference room, where Mr. Reynolds was waiting.

I was surprised to see the entire company present. Daniel was sitting near the front, looking smug.

Mr. Reynolds stood at the front, next to a screen. When he saw me, he nodded.

“Now that we’re all here,” he said, “I want to address something.”

The screen displayed the video of me entering the restroom. I felt embarrassed as I heard whispers in the room.

Then, Mr. Reynolds laughed.

“Okay,” he said. “Who thinks this video is funny? Be honest. Raise your hand.”

Several people raised their hands, including Daniel.

I was stunned. I wanted to express my anger, but then I noticed that Mr. Reynolds was no longer smiling.

“And who,” Mr. Reynolds continued, “thinks this is inappropriate and unprofessional behavior?”

Slowly, more people began to raise their hands.

“Those who found this funny,” Mr. Reynolds said, “please gather your belongings and leave. You are no longer employed here.”

The room was silent.

Daniel’s face turned pale. “What? You can’t be serious. It was just a joke!”

“Workplace harassment is not a joke,” Mr. Reynolds said. “Neither is recording someone without their consent or sharing videos to humiliate them.”

“But—”

“Security will escort you out,” Mr. Reynolds said.

Mr. Reynolds then addressed the rest of the employees. “Those who supported Ms. Wilson will receive a bonus.”

I was speechless.

As Daniel and the others were escorted out, Mr. Reynolds approached me. “Ms. Wilson, I apologize. This should not have happened.”

“Thank you,” I said.

“There’s one more thing,” he said. “We have a department head vacancy. Based on your performance and the respect you have earned from your colleagues, I would like to offer you the position.”

“Me?” I asked. “You want me to replace Daniel?”

“I want the most qualified person,” he said. “Your reports have been excellent, and you understand that leadership requires integrity.”

I was overwhelmed with emotion. From feeling overlooked to being offered a leadership position in a short time.

“Do you accept?” Mr. Reynolds asked.

I thought about Daniel, the video, and the times I had felt marginalized. Then I thought about the positive changes I could make in this role.

“Yes,” I said. “I accept.”