A man came home from work one day

Story 1: The Vegas Ultimatum

A man came home from work to find his wife sitting on the porch with her bags packed.

“Where do you think you’re going?” he demanded.

“To Las Vegas,” she replied. “I just found out I can earn $400 a night for what I’ve been giving you for free!”

The man paused, then dashed inside. Moments later, he returned with his own suitcases.

“And where are you going?” she asked, stunned.

He grinned. “I want to see how you plan to survive on $800 a year!”

Story 2: The Lawyer’s Clever Answer

A lawyer with twelve children needed a new home after his landlord reclaimed the property. But every time he mentioned his large family, landlords refused to rent to him, fearing the kids would wreck the place.

So he devised a plan. He sent his wife and eleven children to walk through the cemetery, while he took just one child along to view houses with the agent.

He found a home he loved, and the agent asked, “How many children do you have?”

“Twelve,” the lawyer replied.

“Where are the others?” the agent pressed.

With his best courtroom expression, the lawyer answered solemnly:
“They’re in the cemetery with their mother.”

Moral: You don’t always need to lie — sometimes, you just need the right words.